Oh the Huge Manatees

I know I've said it a million times, but I love reality TV. It's no secret.
But some of the shows I watch and the way I watch are a bit on the, well, secret side. Living alone helps.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition is like that, I'm a little reluctant to say I watch it. I mean it's so cheesy and fakey and you're always hearing stories about the shit going all kinds of wrong after the production crew leaves. Plus do not even get me started on that Ty Pennington character. Gawd.

While I won't go so far as to set a season pass, I will let you know that i rarely miss an episode. That I watch it is embarrassing, how I watch it is even worse. I watch the 1st 10 minutes to hear the sob story and I cry. Then I fast forward through the next 40 minutes right up until they move the bus so I can watch the family's reaction to their new house. Then I cry again, if it's a good one, but they know what they're doing - they rarely fail to get the emotional money shot.

Even though I'm crying I still have my cynical jerk hat on and I'm constantly wondering how they're going to pay the taxes on all their new shit, and what they're going to do with a 'Horton Hears a Who' bedroom when their daughter isn't 6 anymore. So I was super psyched to see a day by day profile of EM:HE in the NYTimes Mag this weekend.

I learned lots of new facts, like, they actually do do it all in a week, they do make 4 year olds do retakes till they steer their little wheelchairs across the lawn correctly, and ABC pays for exactly nothing besides the cast and crew.

Here's my favorite part:

'Turning a charity event into a spectacle — and allowing donors to see recipients weep with joy — was a fairly common practice at the turn of the last century. In 1891, the Christmas Society organized an event at Madison Square Garden where the wealthy were invited to buy tickets to watch poor children open Christmas presents on the floor below. Around this time, in New York and elsewhere, there were Bowery Christmas dinners, where the wealthy paid to watch the poor eat a sumptuous feast. There were even specialized events for watching groups of orphans, African-Americans or even newsboys get their fill.'

Did you know that??? See, olde tyme people are just as bad as we are. Or I am, at least.