Kooky Old White Man Lies About Past

I'm trying to run a clean campaign here but the truth is the truth. I can't just get off the straight talk express because I want a beer and a good night's sleep.
You see, I must trash talk McCain.
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Rolling Stone has an awesome article that's trash talk-licious. Did you know McCain is a shitty pilot with daddy issues???

John Sidney McCain III and George Walker Bush both represent the third generation of American dynasties. Both were born into positions of privilege against which they rebelled into mediocrity. Both developed an uncanny social intelligence that allowed them to skate by with a minimum of mental exertion. Both struggled with booze and loutish behavior. At each step, with the aid of their fathers' powerful friends, both failed upwardIn one vital respect, however, the comparison is deeply unfair to the current president: George W. Bush was a much better pilot.

BURN!!!!!!!

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Steven Almond at Nerve has a rundown of McCain's womanizing, mysoginistic ways. Featuring this gem of a joke John likes to trot out:

Did you hear the one about the woman who is attacked on the street by a gorilla, beaten senseless, raped repeatedly and left to die? When she finally regains consciousness and tries to speak, her doctor leans over to hear her sigh contently and to feebly ask, "Where is that marvelous ape?"

Note that the article was written by a MAN, not another super sensitive boner-killer feminazi.

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And lastly, you know that guy from the last debate who McCain said probably hadn't heard about Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac before this current financial crisis started?? (pictured left)

Yeah, he had. He probably heard about them while he was getting his BA in PoliSci or his Masters in Legal Studies, or his SECOND Masters in Public Administration.
And yes, he did think it was condescending. Could this have anything to do with the fact that he's a young black man??? Nah!